Biggest news ever!

Let's recall my biggest news ever...I'm finally going to be a mom!!!

I know, I had convinced myself that it would just never happen, but it did!  I was convinced that I was just too old and past a "good" age to start having children.  I was content with DS (the beau) and our two fur babies, Sheldon and Massimo.

I realized how much I had settled into the idea of never having children shortly after finding out we were expecting.  It hit me like a sledgehammer one day in the car.  I was pregnant.  I was pregnant.  I was going to bring a life into this world and be responsible for it and be a mom and...shew.  It was a lot to take in.  I realized I truly believed that it would never happen to me.

But it did and I'm so thankful and happy.  It brings happy tears to my eyes.

So, my pregnancy story.  How it all happened.  We weren't planning it.  We had talked about it and had decided if we wanted it, we would wait for about two years for me to finish school (more on this later) and then we could talk about it.

Life has a way, you know?  It does what it wants and takes you in directions you never saw coming.  Turns out antibiotics work in much the same way...taking you in directions you never thought and counter-acting on your meticulous birth control consumption.

In August I was sick...like bronchitis sick.  My doctor had to put me on an antibiotic and z-pack.  Thought nothing of it...continued to take the trusty birth control (hey, it hadn't failed me yet), and DS and I went about life as normal.

In September I was sick...like not able to eat, keep anything down, generally felt like utter crap.  After two weeks of being miserable, I went to the doctor again.  Here's a brief script:

Do you think you're pregnant?  "No...I haven't missed a day of birth control in like 5 years."
When was your last menstrual cycle?  "I take my birth control continuously so my last period was about 6 months ago (I did this for medical reasons...it is completely safe and was doctor recommended for me)."
Ok, what's going on today?

At which point I described the anguish I had been enduring for the past few weeks.  Horrible nausea/vomiting, exhausted, unable to eat...yadda, yadda, yadda.  Truly, I felt like death.

My doctor is amazing and has been seeing me for almost four years now.  She knows my body pretty well and knows I have the crappiest immune and "gut" health ever.  So, she ruled that the antibiotics I had taken for bronchitis had wiped all of the good bacteria from my gut and had caused an imbalance that was making me very ill.  This had happened once before about three years ago so it didn't sound so foreign to me.

I would feel better in no more than two weeks, she claimed, and wrote me a script for probiotics and enzymes to re-boost my "gut".  I was ready to feel better asap so I immediately filled and began taking said meds.

Early September, I had bronchitis AGAIN so I was back on antibiotics.  I was super sick for DS's 30th birthday which was super sad, because it was such a fun day.  Train ride with picnic for lunch then dinner with friends: Sonic ice cream and dancing that evening.  He had an amazing day.  I was still sick to my stomach.

In October I was still battling the nausea/vomiting/weakness but life must go on so we went on a bourbon tour to celebrate our anniversary early.  Our very first date was at Woodford Reserve so we thought it would be fun to go back and do a tour.  It was so fun and special to commemorate our first year the same way we started, and I think we will make it a tradition.  It's just so beautiful there in the fall.  Anyways, we were in the mashing room (technical term for bourbon lovers) and I almost lost my ginger ale.  Made it to the cellars and the cool, crisp air made me feel almost normal again.  I decided to celebrate by tasting the special select bourbon and bourbon balls they had for our tasting.  So one shot and one bourbon ball later we were leaving the tour area and I jokingly turned to DS and said "Well, if I'm pregnant, it's either drunk or going to die".  Retrospect:  poor choice of words, it was a joke, don't jump down my throat.

The whole ride home I couldn't stop thinking about what I said and the thought of "what if I am pregnant?" kept rippling through my mind.  I had to know for sure.  This was the first day the thought of possibility even came to mind.  I had been sick for WEEKS at this point...could it be?

As soon as I got home I went upstairs to use the bathroom and found an old pregnancy test shoved in the back of my hair products drawer (remember that menstrual cycle I mentioned 6 months ago...yeah, google made me test it).  I took the test, waited patiently for a whole 30 seconds before both strips were blue.  Both strips were blue.  Ripped the box from the trashcan to double check and make sure.  Gulp.  I called for DS to come upstairs in sheer-panic-voice.  He didn't even make it to the top before I was holding the test out for him to see.  Then: gut wrenching sobbing and wailing.  We weren't planning this.  I was in shock.  I had had bourbon!  Suddenly my joke was no longer a joke.

I have to hand it to DS, he handled the situation with grace and man-strength.  He held me, comforted me, let me sob.  He was amazing.

We bought a second test the next day and I took both only to find the first was not faulty.  Monday we called for an appointment with my regular doctor to have my HCG levels checked.  Friday we found out I was about 7-8 weeks along.  The next week we went to an OBGYN and had our first ultrasound.  I was 9 weeks and due May 12, 2015.  I had never seen DS smile so genuinely than when he saw the first images of baby.  A tear rolled down my cheek.

Here we go.